Nothing pleases my dog, Chai, more than to trash and kill a stuffed toy and then rip it’s heart (the squeaker) out, still pounding.  She then proceeds to systematically pluck the guts out in little white clouds of fuzz and spit them all around her so she can lay inside her circle of power.  Nothing strokes her ego more than to know she can destroy a toy at any given moment—rarrhh—what raw, domesticated, instinct!

So why is it that visitors to our store, Pretentious Pooch, are always looking for the indestructible toy?  I hear all the time; “My dog will destroy that in 30 seconds!”  I think we have to talk about our expectations and role in the annihilation of Rover’s fuzzy squeaky toy and come to a realization that we can’t save them all.

You have to place your dog’s toys into a few human categories: vulnerable but precious (you’ve paid a lot for this one), super fun (you dog loves this toy), safe for unsupervised play (they’ll never destroy that—right), and lastly, the old or cheapo, (go ahead and destroy it) toy.  Free yourself from the limits you place on yourself and let your dog’s toys flow from category to category.  Take a deep breath—inhale—exhale.  Now center yourself in the dog toy world.

For some people, they have to reach a higher spiritual plane to be able to let go of the $10.99 spent on the stuffed critter and let their beast go to town—well, being a dog.  In my household Chai has toys that are interactive and I want them to last either because I paid a little more for them or because she loves them so much I determine she would be happier playing with them again rather than destroy them.  I keep these toys high on a shelf and it’s a special treat to be able to play with them.  This play is always interactive and supervised so the object of here aggression lives to play another day.

She also has durable toys that she can gnaw on anytime she likes.  Hard bones, rubber bones, and sometimes rope toys fall into this category.  These are the toys she turns to when I’m watching TV and she just can’t seem to get my attention no matter how many full belly sighs of boredom come bellowing out her floppy cheeks.

Finally there is the dead toy walking category.  These poor toys have either been tortured and abused to such and extent that they will welcome the day their squeaky finally squeaks no more or their fate was sealed as sacrificial toys either when the manufacture chose cheap raw materials or the retailer put them on super sale.  These poor toys server only one purpose: to be victims of the canine pounce, rip, and tear.  Adios amigos!  If dog’s could smoke, this is when you would see them lying back, propped up against the couch, enjoying a drag, and looking into some doggie pleasure space somewhere between the now and later.

My fear is that, whether it’s being frugal or just too human realistic, people are denying their dogs the simple pleasure of destruction when if fact, they just need to put a little though, expectation, and interaction into the toys that they purchase.

Tom Berger, Owner
Pretentious Pooch Dog Boutique
Baltimore, Maryland
www.pretentiouspooch.com